Pastor's Message

December 31, 2000,

FAMILY CONNECTIONS

In the midst of a mailbox full of Christmas cards appeared what we simply call the "family letter." It is a perpetual letter that has been circulating among my brothers and sisters for nearly forty years. Back in the early sixties my oldest brother wrote a newsy letter to the next oldest in the family. She added her letter and sent it on to the next, and so forth. I am the twelfth of thirteen children, so by the time I got the letter, it included eleven letters. After Judy, the youngest added hers, she sent it back to the oldest, who replaced his previous letter with a new one.

Times have changed during those many years. When the letter started, most of my brothers and sisters had young children, and that's what they wrote about. Now almost all are grandparents. It used to be the primary lifeline among siblings who live in eight different states. Now we all have e-mail addresses and regularly communicate that way.

Several times when one or the other has lived outside of the United States, the letter has gone abroad. One time it was lost.

Nonetheless, we have continued the letter. It has become a forum for us to share thoughts and views on everything from social concerns to ways to approach retirement (they are retired; I'm not even close to it.)

After our parents' deaths, the letter allowed us to share thoughts, tell stories, and recount memories - all of which had a healing effect on us.

So often when people hear the word "family" they think about the nuclear family of children at home. Adult siblings need to be family as well. It takes work to stay connected, but it truly is worth it.

On this feast of the Holy Family, it may be a good time to reach out to your brothers and sisters, regardless of age or geographical distance.

Fr. Herb

December 24, 2000

FAVORITE CAROLS

I recall as a child having a copy of a home-made Christmas caroler's book. One of my older brothers or sisters made it in school, I suspect. The cover of the book was cardboard wrapped in Christmas paper. The pages, containing familiar Christmas songs hand printed on lined paper, were bound together by ribbon. I fell in love with that little book.

By the time Christmas came I had all the songs memorized. In fact, I would often sing through my repertoire when I was alone. I still like carols today.

Which is my favorite? That all depends. I have always been partial to "O Holy Night" for the sheer power of the "Fall on your knees" refrain. But "Silent Night" ranks right up there and has become the unofficial official song of celebration.

Yet the line that most captures my imagination comes from "O Little Town of Bethlehem." Perhaps you know the line, too: "The hopes and fears of all the years are met in thee tonight." Each Christmas I find myself encouraged that people's greatest hopes for humankind can become possible because of the birth of Jesus. And the worst of all fears can be put aside for at least a while.

Carols are prayers. As we sing them this year, maybe they will bring back childhood thoughts and dreams. The event, of which we sing, is not just for children and it never grows old.

Merry Christmas!

Fr. Herb

December 17, 2000

GOOD GIVING

About this time every year I hear people say, "I still have some gifts that I have to buy." I know, of course, that the "have to buy" part may mean that they want to buy those gifts before Christmas. But whenever there seems to be an obligation, I start to wonder if it is really a gift at all. Think about it. Gifts are items freely bestowed on someone else. They are chosen as a sign of affection or appreciation. A real gift is often initiated in thoughtful consideration of another. Please don't misunderstand me. I am not saying not to bother to get that gift for your in-laws or whoever else is on your list. What I am suggesting is that this Christmas there should be genuine gift-giving taking place. Consider the following.

At least once this year, give a gift to someone who will not reciprocate. The mutual gift exchanges that are so common almost become a type of bartering rather than giving. Another possibility is to give something that you already own and treasure. I have passed on to family members and friends books, CD's, or other items that I personally enjoy. If a gift is meant to be from the heart, then it makes sense that it be something that is valued. Occasionally in a store, people come upon something that they are certain would be perfect for someone else. Why not make a gift of it - even if that person is not on the gift list, even if it is not Christmas or birthday time! Now that is real gift-giving.

Finally, I suspect that even the "obligatory gifts" can become more freely-given gifts by changing one's perspective. In the process of buying and wrapping those items, trying to think how much someone may appreciate the gift may keep the focus on what it is all about.

This Christmas, in trying to do some real gift giving, we may more fully appreciate the value of the ultimate gift freely given to us, Jesus our Savior.

Fr. Herb

December 10, 2000

INTELLIGENT TALK

Talk is cheap, the old saying goes. Talk is also very popular. More and more radio stations, for example, are carrying talk shows. Some have hosts who rant and rave, readily expressing their own biases and opinions. Others allow callers to air their views, no matter how well- or ill-informed they may be. In contrast, a nearby public radio station claims to be the "home of news and intelligent talk." How intelligent is our talk? To be intelligent, conversation must be based on some true understanding of situations and guiding principles. It has to be thoughtfully presented. And it has to be willing to respect other opinions.

Perhaps it is not new that people like to hear themselves talk, but it seems that the country is presently going through an epidemic of empty words. Yes, we need intelligent talk. We also need occasions of no words at all. Perhaps more time for reflecting would serve all of us well.

I often think of Advent as calling us to quiet and thoughtfulness. It is a time to be more gentle in dealing with ourselves and others. In times of reflection, we can more intelligently focus on the mystery of the season; namely, that our deliverance, our salvation, is near at hand.

Fr. Herb

December 3, 2000

ALL ABOUT CANDLES

The primary symbol of Advent is the wreath which includes four candles. Today, as we light the first candle, we become acutely aware of candles' significance in our lives.

Most obvious is the fact that candles provide light. The Christophers (a movement of people with a message of hope) like to quote that it is better to light just one candle than to curse the darkness. Often it only takes one candle to keep someone from stumbling or becoming disoriented.

The flame of the candle burns upwards, lifting itself towards heaven. No wonder people light votive candles to accompany the prayers they send to God. As the candle burns, it eventually burns itself up, spending itself totally for its purpose of light and heat.

A candle cannot burn unless there is oxygen to support the flame. Yet a cruel gust of wind can extinguish that same flame.

Finally, candles provide a warm and sensitive atmosphere, removing some of the harshness of overly-bright lights. In that gentle glow many people find space and time for reflection and prayer.

So we light the first candle this beginning Sunday of Advent. Like the candle, we pray that we will be lit with a new flame, a flame that will lift our hearts towards God. As the community provides us with the holy breath to keep the flame burning, may we be kept safe from all cruelty and destructiveness. In that glow may we be renewed during this season.